Who the heck is “Us”?
I recently joined the email list for an artist I know. It was a big learning experience. I have known this artist for quite some time. She is a full-time artist who maintains a strong following. She is definitely not an “us” business owner.
And yet, this impersonal and corporate sounding “us” is what I experienced as I went through the process of signing up. She had done very little to tweak the template for her sign-up format. So this is what I got as my “welcome” email:
Your subscription to our list has been confirmed. Welcome!
We are happy to have you as a member of our community. Your email address has been recorded in our database. In the future, you will receive periodic emails specific to your interests.
Privacy is important to us; therefore, we will not sell, rent, or give your name or address to anyone. At any point, you can select the link at the bottom of every email to unsubscribe.
She did personalize the next section where my “free gift” was announced, but then it went right back to generic:
Thanks again for registering. If you have any questions or comments, feel free to contact us.
Are you an individual or are you a group? For a few reading this, you might be a team. Maybe you have employees or a partner or are part of a coop. But if you are a sole operator, you must not fall into the habit of trying to be bigger or sound like you are bigger. Avoid going with the flow of your templates that use the generic “us”. In fact, even if you have a team, it might still be a good idea to drop the “us” and stay in the one-to-one mode of conversation.
Generic sets a bad tone. In fact, make sure you lose as much of that generic language as possible. “Database”? And “…periodic emails specific to your interests”? Who talks like that? Less is more when it comes to “corporate speak”.
Especially for those of you who have creative minds! Take down those impersonal “walls” and be yourself.
Want some fresh eyes? Contact me for a free Website Review and I will ruthlessly dig into your language and give you my “Marketing Effectiveness” first impressions.